Olympic Puck Prediction Time!

Gather round kids! It's time for Olympic Puck!

Take a break from all that curling action I know you're watching (I'm not kidding either, watch it.)
(I heart Eve Muirhead, CALL ME?!?!?)
Anyways, the event that I care most about starts today at noon, so for the record, I got my predictions post up before the pucks dropped.  You may just be reading it after some games played. Lazy people... why didn't you wake up for the first games?!?! Or at least read my blog...

So I'm gonna cut right to the chase, medal predictions because that's all we care about.

Bronze: The Ruskis of Mother Russia
This'll be disappointing for the host nation, but hey at least they'll end the Olympics with a win?  Russia is strong, but so are the rest of the Olympic squads.  Russia's advantage is home ice advantage.  The Russian crowds have been loud for curling, just imagine what they'll be like for hockey?
Key to success: Pavel Datsyuk.
The health of their captain will be key to their success.  Sergei Bobrovski called him the leader of their team and their best player.  (Not Ovechkin, Dan Patrick, stop being stupid.)  If Pavel is healthy enough to be Pavel for Russia, they could easily find themselves in the gold medal game in their home country.  I just think the teams I put ahead of them are too strong.
Speaking of teams ahead of them...

Silver: Team Canada
The favorites of every hockey tournament every year and defending gold medal winners are going DOWN!  Which is hard to predict, because they're so damn good.  Mike Babcock is at the helm and has been hush hush about his starters, but as for forward lines it literally doesn't matter.  They have the best forwards in the tournament.  John Tavares is slotted to be their fourth line center. Tavares. Fourth center.  Let that sink in...
Key to success: Whoever the hell is in net.
Four years ago, Martin Brodeur started and struggled. The Canadians switched to Bobby Lou and won gold.  This year Bobby Lou is back... but probably as their third or backup goalie.  Carey Price is probably favored to get the initial start and Mike Smith is also in the mix.  Whichever one they pick, he won't nearly be as talented as the goalie they go against in a gold medal game, which brings me to this...

Gold: USA USA USA
Aaaahhh was there any doubt who I'd predict? Logic be damned!
Well even without my tremendous homerism, the United States has a legitimate chance at taking home the gold.  Between the pipes will be arguable the best goalie in the NHL with Jonathan Quick.  The forwards are good and most of the team played in the 2010 games so there's experience and cohesion. Shocked to see Bobby Ryan and Jack Johnson left off the team, we'll see how those decisions turn out...
Keys to succes: Patrick Kane and Phil Kessel
Why those two? Cuz they're my favorites.  And they're big time players.  Patrick Kane was the best US forward 4 years ago and loves the international stage.  If those two goal scorers are scoring goals, the Americans will be in great shape.
Also, i want Jimmy Howard to play ONE GAME. But it won't happen...

Teams to watch out for to totally bust up my predictions:
Sweden: Sweden won gold the last time the games were in Europe on the gigantic ice.  They have six Red Wings and Jonathan Ericsson's older brother so you know they're good.  They also have King Henrick in net.  I have them finishing fourth right now. Just cuz. Also, one of the Sedins pulled out, so that's like losing two players cuz one can't play without the other.  That's how twins work, right?
Finland:
The Fins have arguable the best goaltending trio in the Olympics with Annti Niemi, Kari Lehtonen, and Tuuka Rask.  But the Fins suffered three big losses when Valteri Filppula (yeah that guy) Mikko Koivu and Saku Koivu all pulled out from the team.  They'll go as far as their goaltending can take em.
All the other teams except for Latvia and Slovenia.
Those two teams aren't quite as good... especially Slovenia.  They have Jan Mursak.  Remember him? No?  Red Wing prospect who flamed out and is now in the KHL.  He shoots right handed so I'd take him back any day, but that's neither here nor there.

USA takes on the Slovaks of Slovakiatown tomorrow at 7:30 AM watch it live or else twitter, or ESPN phone app or your neighbor's dog will spoil it for you.  They always do...

NBC sucks at covering Olympics.